“...though your sins are like scarlet, they shall be as white as snow; though they are red like crimson, they shall become like wool.” Isaiah 1:18
I recently found a Pink Pearl eraser in my junk drawer. I was balancing my checkbook, which I do in pencil, and realized I had re-entered a large series of transactions that I would need to remove in order to bring my account into balance. I knew that the little pink rubber end of my pencil was inadequate for the job. That’s when I dug through the junk-drawer and found said Pink Pearl eraser.
I love Pink Pearl erasers. I know that may seem like an odd confession. To be honest, I have a great affinity towards any and all office products. I don't know why. I don't know what the appeal is. But I know that when I stare down an office supply aisle while shopping, it fills me with an unexpected joy. All those organized piles, neat and tidy: notebooks, calendars, little containers of paper clips... It is a significantly satisfying experience.
However, the Pink Pearl eraser holds a special place in my heart (along with the traditional mustard-yellow, Pee-Chee, that I may save for a future blog post. We’ll see.). I will always remember how a fresh-out-of-the-package Pink Pearl eraser felt in my hand. I never wanted to spoil its pristine lines. Another factor to the Pink Pearl eraser’s appeal was it’s distinct Pink Pearl smell: a clean, synthetic rubber (an oxymoron, maybe, but appealing nonetheless). Conversely, there is a certain appeal to the well used, well loved Pink Pearl (such as the one I found in the junk drawer). All the sharp edges are worn away. There are pencil lead scars across its face. Green magic-marker, just barely visible, a testimony to its owner’s name. I’m sure it was once housed in a plastic pencil box, snuggled close between broken crayons, dull colored-pencils, No. 2s and wayward pencil shavings.
The feel of a well loved Pink Pearl in your hand is a soft, smooth texture. Its weight is still significant. The most satisfying Pink Pearl experience, though, is when it is used for its intended purpose: rubbing out mistakes. The Pink Pearl glides effortlessly over the graphite lines and curves. In a few strokes, mistakes are erased and there is little evidence of their existence. With a swipe of the hand, the rubber shavings left behind are wiped away and a pristine page is resurrected.
There aren’t many times in our lives we swipe away our mistakes like a Pink Pearl eraser does. Wouldn’t it be wonderful if we could? If there were a way to rub away the times when we hurt the feelings of a loved one, when we made a poor choice, when we were selfish or entitled or prideful... To have the mechanism to go back to a plain-white sheet; a re-do, a do-over. It is an elemental desire for mankind.
Unfortunately, it is not something we get in this lifetime, at least not on earth.
Our mistakes are carried with us daily like a badge, a scarlet scar. Sometimes the badge is a flashing light with a blaring horn. Sometimes the scar is so small and almost undetectable. It’s once burning crimson now faded to a white imperfection of the skin. But, we know it’s there.
The Bible says that when we bring our mistakes to God, he can erase them. This is such good news, at least for me. I know that my badges and scars are hard to wear, hard to carry, hard to ignore. The weight of the shame they cause is often greater than the weight of the transgression.
Fortunately, there is a simple solution. We lay our badges and scars at the foot of the cross. We give our transgressions, our mistakes, our failures, to the one who created us. He is the one who knows us the most. He knows our inner workings, thoughts, struggles and shame. God wants us to trust him with our mistakes. He will gladly take them from us. He will wipe them away.
But that's not where the transaction ends. There is still work on our end to do. We give our mistakes to Jesus… He forgives… and then we have to forgive ourselves. The badges will always be there. They are our battle-wounds, but the shame that comes with them does not have to stay. It is not a burden we are required to carry. With God’s forgiveness comes the permission to release the shame.
Allow yourself to be unburdened. It is not easy. It takes time. It takes patience. It takes bravery. You have to remind yourself that the mistake is not yours to carry anymore. You have to remember that God took it, and so you must trust him to do with it what he will.
You are unencumbered. You are released. You are free.
Unfortunately, you will make another mistake eventually. You are human. Mistakes are pretty much a guarantee. But a pencil is only as good as its eraser. Therefore, you will be able to continue returning to the cross again and again as you need God’s forgiveness, his mercy and his grace. As you release the shame, you will see its hard, fast lines begin to disappear. God will wipe those mistakes away and leave your page white as snow… And that’s even better than a brand new Pink Pearl eraser.
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